Like I said in the first post, an elsewhere of this blog, I transcended the human condition at the age of 21, in August 1998. At first, I saw it as a traumatic event.
The first months as an awakened person, I thought that what did happen to me was that I had burned my mind and brains beyond repair. I thought that I had gone to a forbidden place that was beckoning me since my teenage years.
Somewhere in the late 1990s I read an extensive article on the web of which the main premise was that Windows95 was Satanic.
The article went to great lenghts to demonstrate, by means of a comparision between numerology and Win95’s technology, that everything in Win95 was done as factual mimicking and a relationship between the software and Satanic numerology and Satanic geometry.
Things were always better in the good old days.
It’s a law of life on earth and of human civilization, not an idiom or a relative idelogy that is waiting to be debated/debunked.
I wonder how much of an advantage do I have knowing that the degrading of reality as time goes by is an inevitable fact and not a possibility that can be averted. Knowking that is also saddening, a heavy load.
Three days ago, on Friday the 30th, 2017, it was one month since I smoked a cigarette for the last time.
With my old vape pen and my new RTA and mod I am managing and devolving a vice that I was slave to for a quarter century.
I confess that I think that cigarettes are okay, but I’m not really jonesing for them anymore. I’m disregarding any thoughts about them since the first week.
I’m still trying to manage my time and make everything I want and need to do fit into the tight schedule of studying several things at once. The return to yoga I planned in August didn’t turn out as I expected, mainly because I started a four months course in a community college and had to readjust my schedule to having to go there 5 days a week three hours per day; but at least I didn’t forsake my weight lifting training.
Yesterday the last day of my most recent payment for one month at the gym ended and so today I am beginning a new hatha-yoga season.
It’s nice to have the muscles toned and to be feeling well for the weight lifting training, but I feel that not doing yoga and progressing in that endeavor too (like I have been doing for the last seventeen years) disconnects me from my higher self.
Weight lifting is so enlivening and fun to practice, that even when I put myself the limit of doing only mid-bore workouts I forget and sometimes one or two full-bore workouts slip in a month’s schedule, this has to be controlled because it really tires me.
Now I’m waiting one week to reboot my weight-lifting, and so, I am aiming now to at least 6 (aiming at 7 really) consecutive days of hatha after waking up, before I return to the gym.
Once returning I have to have the drive to combine the two practices; intertwining them. It’s not I can’t because my body is taxed (being tired is good because I sleep and that makes me grow), it’s because doing any of the two all the time, every day either of the two is quite a time sink against study and work.
I’m kind of ashamed that for many months now I’m going through a phase when I can’t keep up with yoga, while this isn’t the case with the gym, it’s disappointing anyhow.
2012 hatha fiasco:
Jan: 1 (session)
Feb: -
Mar: 4
Apr: 5
May: 1
Jun: -
Jul: 3
Aug: 2
Sep: (about to begin)
2012 gym workouts:
Jan: 9
Feb: 6
Mar: 5
Apr: 2
May: 6
Jun: 5
Jul: 2
Aug: 3
Sep: 6 + maybe another one or two
Overall except for January, all the other months I didn’t achieve the quota of combined 12 days per month exercise bare minimum, which sucks… I just needed to be presented with how uncaring I was, like now I took the work to record and see it for what it is.
Well, I’d be damned… but last week I had a problem with Windows that, on retrospective, is food for thought as related to what I wrote here in the last days of July.
My point about Linux as opposed to Windows was about how solid and robust Windows seems to be in comparison to Linux; which in exchange seems to run faster than Windows. I still think it is, as long as one’s Windows is not screwed by M$ itself. Although primarily my rants where about software available for both operating systems and not so much at the operating system level.
Well I was wrong, because there is not much point in lionizing Windows as the cutting edge of consumer and/or power user computing for the simple fact that, while everything works well and doesn’t break unexpectedly like it does in Linux, in Windows, if you rely on M$ for receiving updates you are setting it up for trouble and your system is virtually at the mercy of corporate psychopathy. I’ll explain why.
There is a first time for everything and in the world of corporate abuse and negligence, I was yet to witness the same crap I accustomed to witness in Linux, but in Win$low!!! Updating Mint has let me without WiFi connection, and there is no, and I MEAN NO FIX for it.
To put a long story (one week) short, I’ll tell that, being the experienced PC user I am, I never run into major problems with my PC unless something external prompts them. But once the shit hits the fan I’m at a loss in a manner way worse than when illogic crap makes me suffer on the Unix-like world.
In Windows soft matters I am always well-informed and as pertaining the use and maintenance of the operating system itself, I am used to behave towards the operating system in a flowing and caring way that only makes use of best practices and I never do stupid things that can put the integrity and stability of the operating system in jeopardy.
What concisely happened: I didn’t update Win$low since mid-June, and in the 20-25 days without updates there were like half a dozen important updates wanting to be downloaded and installed.
Since I started going outside to do stuff, and taking on account the time drain it would mean I wanted to be sure Win$low was in a hardened condition that will prevent any damned cracker mess with my rig, and make me lose time.
I proceeded to download and install the updates and (I don’t want to make a narrative or give much detail about this) it simply destroyed my Windows 7 AMD64’s kernel!!!…
After the system rebooted to finish updating my 64 bits Windows simply stopped working… tasks will give a semblance of being working, but multiply the time each things takes to be done by 350 and you’ll have the slug-like lag everything ended up.
A couple of hours later and trying to see what was wrong I realized it was the updates… it was so obvious!!! I uninstalled them but it was too late, the damage to the kernel was done and I was with a new copy of Windows 7 rendered unusable and un-updatable, DAMN!
So… it’s time to think of it and think until which point makes sense to rely on Win$low circus of corporate socio-economical resentment, because being ripped off by them like I was… it sounds to me more like the attempts of traumatized dweebs that think the world owes them something for all the abuse in their “academic formation” they received; where their learnt to be… you know what.
For me this can mean only one thing: it’s done with being at Win$low’s mercy… If I have the knowledge to cope with the degenerate hate of crackers and cybercriminals, and with the corporate idiots’ backwardness it only can mean that I’m not going to be updating Windows anymore whatsoever, mistrust Windows (although I’m a user of it since 3.11) from now on, and do with cottage-industry security soft that has proven to have products that transcended the freetard barrier.
And no, I wasn’t able to manage my anxiety nor to do yoga or weight lifting while the whole deception lasted.
In late 2011 I became acquainted with the state of things in the current, so-called, ‘free open source software’ world, AKA the GNU scene. I was in for a wild ride of constrained and diminished productivity, frustration, malevolently designed and prepackaged sidetracking and a nauseous deception.
I accept that in the early 2000s I bought into the baits of the free soft movement and thought that, when the moment of applying myself to knowing, learning and using FOSS came I will make the best use of it.
My motives were mainly inspired by foreseeing the added satisfaction and feeling of accomplishment of having risen from being an outsider with a lot of ideas to implement to the platform of a self-made Internet entrepreneur that became one without paying any kind of allegiance (and money$) to the corporate world (mainly M$ and Adob€/Macrom€dia), oh boy, how naïve I was!
Without going into much detail (I have content about this topic for an XL article about the dangers of trusting the FOSS/GNU worlds blindly) I can say that the (travesty of) software brands and (experiments of) development firms of the GNU scene are a hoax in the sense that they are publicized as a free alternative to paid, established operating systems, tools, applications and platforms when in fact that’s way far from the truth.
GNU and FOSS are a free alternative to mainstream soft, but for NERDS and DWEEBS, not a real state-of-the-art, power-user friendly alternative that can be considered by those Windows users that flowed with the times and are dependent on real computing.
I lack the means to express with words in what degraded, depressing and hopeless world I was thrown as soon as I begun giving my first baby steps in the world of self-made Internet entrepreneurship.
To put it bluntly, the most desirable, formerly even coveted, GNU and FOSS pieces of soft are a form of enslavement way worse than any sort of corporate abuse I ever got from Windows and its soft. I wanted to talk about this in this article in a prosaic way so I’m gonna try defining what I perceived in one paragraph:
It looked as if the open source disasters were crafted as a sort of resented, vengeful expression against the world perpetrated by the dorks, nerds, twerps and dweebs who wade in foss/gnu (aka FREETARDS) development; for the unsuspecting users to pay the dweebs back for so-much ass-kissing, depersonalization, de-individualization, repression, pressure to conform, ostracizing of errors, soul violation and social conditionings they were subjected to in their “formative” and “corpo-noob” years…
The months I fought with open source stuff (mostly platforms more than oses and tools/apps) and I still feel the taint of paying attention to something so little and stupid like it, a tragedy that disconnected me from my higher self for a despicable vomit, project of a lifestyle, that I wasn’t expecting.
Everything was broken, badly done or incredibly nerd-like, in a way that either I did a superhuman effort or the nightmare of having to deal with such a beheaded strata of thought would extended for months on end.
And thus, locked out from this blog and at the same time hardening my soul with the academic torture of the socio-economically resented of the freetards I was far from being living true to my ideals and I felt there was no point in progressing in the hatha-yoga self-discipline because I couldn’t share it openly as I tasted and then loved to do. I wanted to confess that: I love coming here and showing my life to others and it helps me greatly to get in the mood of this kind of things when I want to do them and feel like an effect deserves to be produced on society at large.
Nevertheless, I didn’t give up a life dedicated to physical evolution and perfection because though I wasn’t doing yoga I still had my weight-lifting training to compensate. Now after nine months, I realize that I did it again!!! As I wrote back in this blog that I burnt myself out in weight work outs, it happened AGAIN, and last week I was feeling my muscles like literal parasites craving for food, and fags and stuff: this is not good.
Never gonna give up iron weights training, when you have plenty of gyms near, it’s like a blessing and a total stupidity not making use of them. But if you have to commute I think one can give it a second thought. But when you can walk three minutes to a gym, if you don’t use it, you’re missing something for a life of sloth and sedentary couch potatery that is not mentally sane in my opinion.
I started being extra careful with my gym workouts. Like, I was going only 2 times per week to the gym, and doing far from full bore routines:
two staple exercises: abs and shoulders
three if feeling inspired but most of the time two specific muscle exercises
like, if it was a biceps’ day it will be: abs > biceps exercise 1 > biceps exercise 2 > shoulders and that’s it, on average 30 minutes of workout.
This went okay for several months, and coexisting with hatha-yoga, it works and I can attest to it. But returning to the subject of my baby steps in the commercial Internet fueled by gnu and foss, somewhat the anger I got out from being fighting with software translated to a blind fury in the gyms where I forgot about my preference for hatha-yoga over weight training and fell back into devastating full-bore work-outs, a subtle rejecting of the nerd world of corporal freaks.
Anyway, I’m not chronic fatigued like before, and this is good. I have found ways to cope with one of the intrinsic challenges of an athlete: chronic fatigue and I will be posting about that in the future.
