On Broadcasting Telepathy

 

Like I said in the first post, an elsewhere of this blog, I transcended the human condition at the age of 21, in August 1998. At first, I saw it as a traumatic event.

The first months as an awakened person, I thought that what did happen to me was that I had burned my mind and brains beyond repair. I thought that I had gone to a forbidden place that was beckoning me since my teenage years.

In my teens I had glimpses of that psycho-spiritual place a handful of times, generally before falling asleep. One night in my late teens, I was drifting in and out of sleep while traveling by bus, and I was just one step shy of achieving that experience. But I didn’t have the courage to give that step forward and the opportunity passed because I fell at once back into normal awareness.

I thought that the price I had to pay because of finally having reached that spiritual place was madness and the disolution of boundaries between me and other persons.

But not just between me, and other persons, one of the first realizations I had, starting from the morning after the night of the experience, was that of seeing visible ghosts and perceiving invisible ones.

I reached nirvana on a Friday night. The weekend and the week that followed were probably the most crazy days of my life up to that moment. I spent them with the girl that was my girlfriend at that moment, her sister and her mother.

It’s the person and the days of which I already talked about in the intro to the blog. That stretch of days spent with them were a disadvantage, to be in a place like that when you had just blossomed spiritually.

After like five days with them, I left. I thought, rahter wanted to believe, that ghosts, demons or whatever was in that house were responsible for creating a conduit through which the vibes of other people reached me like never before, and even their minds. But it wasn’t the case.

The eerie spiritual feeling continued in the days that followed, and it soon degenerated into mentality. It degenerated into mentality in the sense that every night, once the lights were out I started feeling that I was reaching my friends minds with only thinking of them.

A lot of mental bullshit from them, and, slowly and increasingly, from me too followed. Because I started giving my baby steps in inner dialogue in those days.

In those nights I’ve seen and learned a few things, the most important one, that I needed, more than wanted, to put thousands of miles between them, my “friends”, and me.

From them on I had to live with the fact of having an ability to make myself heard in the mental plane, maybe an above average one. It wasn’t an easy task.

The First Lustrum (98-2003)

The first five years were probably the less mental of all the time up to now. One month after reaching nirvana I began travelling and it lasted for the next six years. I was in so much awe and excitement with life in those years that I didn’t have time to be mental.

Additionally, to be removed from my familiar environment really helped. Even when back home from those places, the atmospheres, thoughts, feelings and spirits of the places I’ve been wouldn’t leave me.

These were years of being shocked with different realities and takes on life, and they were as hard as they were sweet because they were years of acute physical sickness for me.

The Second Lustrum (2003-2008)

The second lustrum was the most loaded with change of all. Also I think was the period of my life I suffered the most. I suffered melancholy, the depression of a nervous breakdown and chronic fatigue. The nervous breakdown slowly healed. The depression became a maniac depression kind of disorder.

My life changed when I started looking for a broader kind of female beauty. I don’t need to go into much detail because life became grayed-out for me. It became a digital progress existence devoid of a great percetange of social interaction.

If I should compare my life’s phases as them having percentages of social contact I’d say that, starting at eleven years old and up to fifteen, it must have been 100%. Like, between my friends from my neighborhood and my friends from school I didn’t act alone in almost any moment of those years. Indoors and in the street I was most of the time with someone. From fifteen to seventeen it was girfrliend time, so also 100%. From seventeen to twenty-one my social contact percentage must have fallen first to say 80% up to late 1997, and something like 50% in 1998. From 50% social life in 1998 it continued decreasing and I’d say by the time I was steadily staying in South Asia I’d say it had fallen down to 25%.

In the second lustrum and the following one, my social involvement must have been something like 15% or lesss, only getting a few notches above that figure in late 2012 and in 2013.

In these years, as my social involvement decreased, my mental ways slowly started to grow, fuelled by a constant internet use that, on seeing how people is, made me even more anti-social and reclusive.

I must record something marvelous, and it was that somewhere in this span of years I’ve listened to, what I think was, God’s voice telling me something totally crazy in its self-explaining and self-containing simplicity.

The explanation of what I think God told me was something very personal that someone else couldn’t know and piece together to make a show of power blowing my mind like that.

The Third Lustrum (2008-2013)

This season found me living a double life. Pretty much at ease with the seemingly unchangeable fact of me being mental, and more mentally talkative than ever before. I think that not just the time I told in the above paragraphs, but several times up to now I have had what I’d call personal mystic experiences.

Personal not just because they were related to things personal, but mainly because I felt God acting in a direct and personal way with me. Ways that couldn’t have been possibly replicated by a human awareness by means of telepathy.

I think that those experiences did let me in a state of fascination, and decidely willing to talk in the mind for the underlying, most of the time subconscious, fact of having been deeply impressed by the times when I felt that God talked to me dierctly.

The Forth Lustrum (2013-Present)

The year 2013 was the year in which I stopped trusting others completely. It’s kind of sad that it took me thirty-five years in this planet to be able to live without the the preemtive trust and confidence in others I always lived.

To trust persons who you don’t profoundly know is not good anymore. It may have been okay to be like that a quarter of a century ago, and before that time, but now everyone seems to be so morally bankrupt that I don’t think trusting others is a smart way of approaching life.

If the laws and the legal system aren’t involved in my dealing with others, I’m not trusting them, and even in the case of interactions where laws are enforceable, I’m not bringing 100% of my trust to the table until I get convincing proof that the other is trustable.

I think that an excelent way to deal with others is first stuying and then applying game theory to the interactions. It’s a greatly optimized system of interaction that gives the opportunity of having an edge over others who don’t know it, and it’s guaranteed to minimize losses and maximize profits derived from said interactions.

But at the mental plane, for the last four-plus years I’ve been greatly fallen. I came to a point in my life where I felt that nobody that reaches me mentally deserves any respect from me anymore, and this reflexed in the ways I started to act mentally.

What before was a broadcasting telepathy of phenomena, friendship and love, for me degenerated into a constant mental fight to tool down the entities that I don’t like.

I somewhere read that a way to take rob others of their energy is to insult them. Since then, I’ve been insulting in the mind all those entities that tresspass into mine, all those that I don’t like, and those that I downright hate.

Still, the other day, like three weeks ago, I was walking by the street, and it suddenly hit me: I deserve better. I mustn’t let three lustrums of this way of life of being mental, and lately insulting, pass. It’s difficult when you live in a world of repulsive assholes that live because air is free. Besides, I have ways to sublimate my hatred for others, when I feel that need to vent it out.

To vent out the hate of the stupidity of evil, in my personal case, is one of the essential requirements of day to day life, and everyday I think what I’ll do the day that I go somewhere else, and don’t have to deal with the mental and corporal ugliness of angry jerks.

Pic creds: new 1lluminati